Happy birthday Cassandra
Yes, it's your birthday hooray!
Time flies fast, make this day count. I'm sure it'll be gone just like that.
Three years I've known you, once I've seen, but never have I met.
However, it may be your birthday today, but you still got work to do.
Duty before ponies darling... well in your case, pinkie pie time.
I have the presents right here with me, I'll find a suitable time to send them to you.
I really can't think of anything to say.
But I can say is go fucking party until you're a mad dog cunt, cause hey, why not? Special day!
I also realised the Queens birthday is next week. Yeah... you can't get a hangover now. That'll be horrible and anarchy for you.
But enjoy your day today, after all your 17th birthday is once in a lifetime.